Monday, May 8, 2017

Manic Monday Bonus--Interspecies Romance, Sort Of!!

Because some of you have never read a 42 year old comic book (and, in a cheap attempt to collect hits by latching onto a popular movie), I need to tell you about Mantis.

I'm not sure how i should put this....either

A) Mantis [BLEEP]ed a tree; or

B) Mantis [BLEEP]ed the corpse of her dead boyfriend.

Well, actually, it's kinda both. She [BLEEP]ed the corpse of her dead boyfriend that was re-animated by the tree she married!

See, during the Celestial Madonna epic, we were introduced to the Cotati, a sentient plant species that evolved on the Kree homeworld. Some pacifist Kree kung-fu priests (yes, pacifist Kree kung-fu priests) brought a Cotati to earth millennia ago, and planted him in their Vietnamese temple.

When the tree and humanity were ready...well, let's allow the re-animated corpse of the Swordsman explain everything:

Well, after letting her experience life as a prostitute and a super-hero--seriously, I'm not making this up!!--she attains enough human perfection to...


It's not everyday a tree proposes to you, as Mantis' reaction shows!


Look, the Swordsman actually died died. Dead. Corpse.

And if I were going to propose to some woman, I don't think offering her the re-animated body of her dead lover would be viewed as a cool "wedding gift." Especially if "mating" with it were involved.

But these are comics, man...

So, she's going to marry a tree and schtup a zombie. EWWWWWWWWW!!

Well, after complications (this story has both Kang and Dormammu in it, and the wedding of the Vision and Scarlet Witch--no decompression in those days!), they tie the knot. off to the icky honeymoon!!


Mantis eventually came back--creator Steve Englehart was so in love his own character he worked her into virtually every single project he ever wrote, including comics for other companies--and yeah, she had a kid. A physical child. Which means...EWWWWWWW!!!!

I kid because I love. The Celestial Madonna epic is really great (oops--SPOILER ALERT!), and everyone should read the whole saga.

But we should never forget as we enjoy the excellent Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 2--Mantis married a tree and boinked the corpse of her dead boyfriend. 

From Giant-Size Avengers #4 (1975)


SallyP said...

For the love of god, keep her away from Groot!

George Chambers said...

I have to say, I always hated Mantis. She was Englehart's unmitigated Mary Sue, and the first such character I'd ever encountered in my comics-reading life - before the term 'Mary Sue' had ever been coined. Consequently, I always felt that she, and her DC counterpart 'Willow', stunk up any story she appeared in.